RANSVESTIA

I have come to the conclusion that I'm a freak-unique-unlike any other female in the world and doomed to single misery. For I am female but living my life as a man and the only partner I'm prepared to accept in that life is a male who wants to live his life as a woman. And where in the world will I find such a person-someone who was born male with all the limitless future that that entails who not only wants to pass it all up but actually longs for the narrow and restricted life of a woman? Obviously nowhere. Do you wonder that at times I've thought of suicide?”

I snuggled up closer, hardly daring to breathe lest this wonderful confession should be only a dream.

"I liked Keith from the first time I met him. Not that I had any idea then of him as a partner but because he was so small and slim that I could built my fantasies around him-in my imagination dress him as a girl and then take him as my wife-and you've no idea how jealous I was when you came round this morning and I thought you were his girl friend and you were so pretty and—and I was ready to hate you with all my heart. And now-and now-oh Karen-Keith-tell me- are you really the man I've been searching for? Do you really long to your life as a woman just as I long to be a man? Do you? Or is this just a game to you, something to be taken or left just as you feel?"

Hesitantly I told him my own story which matched his in so many ways, almost an exact mirror image. I was in a daze, confused and yet so miraculously happy. In an emotional release I found myself crying softly and gently, the tears spilling down my cheeks to make damp patches on his shirt front. Although the feel of his strong arms round me was so firm and secure I clung tightly to him lest he should dis-

appear.

I don't know how long we stayed like that. Once I heard him murmur "Oh Karen, beloved-" Once he turned and kissed me gently on the forehead. Peace and contentment filled up my soul. The future opened before me, golden and sundrenched.

At length, breaking into my dreaming, he spoke again:

"I suppose you go out in public most of the time as a girl?"

"Oh no-I've been dressing for years but always in private. Last